Bath, February 25th 2013
We ease into Bath’s one-way web in the early afternoon. I dump my accoutrements in the little box of my room and seize the chance to have some real food. The Yo! Sushi I accidentally settle on is staffed by zombified students who appear to be auditioning for a particularly hellish reality show. One of the chefs is wearing a jauntily poised pork-pie hat over his cook’s skull cap. He’s as unhappy a hipster as you’ll ever see. The sad morsels of finicky food revolve around him like piranha circling for a feeding frenzy. He wards them off by chopping radishes at a lunatic intensity sounding like a woodpecker having a heart attack. My colour-coded plastic dishes pile up in a shaming show of greed. The oceans emptying into rich folks’ mouths.
I like the venue, though like all converted cinemas there was never any need for a backstage so our dressing room is a triangle of cupboard at the top of the fire-exit stairs. A further triangle is carved off by a toilet cubicle in the corner, itself cut into two like some ever repeating fractal. No room to swing even a kitten, I hasten back to the hotel after soundcheck to enjoy a refreshing snooze populated by a quick jumble of dreams.
The show is fairly relaxed or at least not as insanely uptight as always with the likes of me. I have a drink with a few folk in an Irish pub around the corner in a daring attempt to socialise that closely resembles fun. In the morning as we light out I see another hat shop and request leave to swing inside for a swift survey. The proprietress is a vicious snob with a nasty complexion like badly butchered meat. She makes me as unwelcome as a stale fart so I linger to irritate her as she eyes me suspiciously while dealing with a woman’s alteration. She won’t be getting my money. Not even if I unearth the most wonderful titfer in the world, a top hat made from badger with a band of Spanish leather and lining of finest spiders’ silk. We drive out past the racecourse, closed until spring. The sky is solid steel grey, unrelenting and angry like an iron curtain across the sun. Sheffield is on our horizon drawing down all this base metal for its saucepans and silverware, a shining city on a hill.
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but her bearded boyfriend’s presence onstage proved to be a major distraction.The pair later ventured out for a romantic boat ride with friends before making their way back to the jetty, sometimes, very right.Why do England keep bowling widesIn the warm-up game at the SSC England sent down 14 wides in 43 overs Ah a bit of rust we thought They’ll sort it out They didn’t The first six one-day internationals produced 64 in wides compared with 25 from Sri Lanka (by contrast England have bowled only one no-ball Sri Lanka five)Once or twice the umpires’ interpretation of what constitutes a wide has not always favoured England But not 64 times Generally the malaise has been two-pronged: misdirected bouncers and leg-side indiscipline Both should be avoidableA list of the miscreants ahead of today’s seventh one-dayer: Woakes 12 wides Ali 10 Jordan 10 Finn7 Gurney 7 Root 7 Stokes 6 Tredwell 3 Bopara 2Why doesn’t Ravi Bopara bowl moreGoing into Tuesday’s final match in Colombo Bopara was England’s meanest seamer in this series with an economy-rate of 546 (which tells its own story) Yet he had been given 15 overs in six matches and never more than four in one Cook plainly doesn’t trust him Perhaps he shouldWhat on earth has happened to Eoin MorganIf the Morgan who hit 62 in 47 balls during the fourth game turns up at the World Cup England will have a sniff If it’s the Morgan who has otherwise scraped together 24 runs in five innings they are doomedThere is a theory that Morgan is at his best a) when England are chasing and he has a goal to aim for and b) when batting first he doesn’t need to rebuild an innings But these conditions do not always applyMorgan says he neglected his own game while the new back-room staff bedded in at the start of the summer and admits he was out-thought by India’s bowlers at the end Whatever the reason his decline has been one of the most alarming aspects of England’s one-day cricket since they returned from AustraliaWhy can no one mount a 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international equilibrium after breaking a wrist punching a locker in the Caribbean in March But what exactly is his one-day role for England No 8 seems too low while fourth- and fifth-change (which is what he was in his two games here in Sri Lanka) felt like a slap in the faceStokes will come again But he needs a defined role – and a bit of TLC?NIGHTWATCHMAN COMPETITION WINNERLast week we asked you how many County Championship games Northamptonshire lost by an innings in 2014 As everyone appeared to know the answer was eight Yes eight But there could be only one winner Congratulations to Ray Foster of Teddington who will be receiving a full set of all eight editions of The Nightwatchman Bloomsbury’s cricket quarterlySpecial bundles of all eight editions of The Nightwatchman can be ordered here – and are guaranteed delivery by Christmas – if they are ordered before midnight tonight” THAT WAS THE WEEK THAT WASTo live or die by the swordA few days on from India’s heroic failure in 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Last night I was in the studio audience for the recording of this week’s Newsjack, where we were required to chant ‘Justin’ over and over at the host Justin Edwards, mimicking the throng of teenage girls outside the hotel over the road chanting ‘Justin’ over and over at some young American chap who just wanted to be left alone to play his Playstation. It just felt wrong.
Yes, where is the Sheffield entry, or are you too busy…… burning CD’s and printing off the covers?!!!! ;-p
In answer to your question Justin my money’s on Thatcher going first. I can’t help have a soft spot for dear old Lizzy unlike her old fart of a hubby who constantly suffers from foot in mouth disease. Hope you don’t get like that in your old age, with my experience with the elderly I’d gladly look after you. Actually I had a ‘seniors moment’ earlier today, I actually called my cat Justin instead of his name. He is handsome like you but he is black and fluffy and to state the bleeding obvious you are not!
I hope it’s Maggie, but whichever one goes first we’ll be picking up the tab. May be worth it, at that, just to dance on the grave.
I’m sure Justin could come up with a suggestion about what Thatcher could come back as as he has such admiration for her (ha ha!). I must be the only person on this earth not on facebook, have no desire.
Isn’t that an insult to the aardvark population? So Justin says someon tried to hack into his facebook page, that’s interesting because that happened not long ago to someone I know here in Australia.
Yes I suppose the Aardvarks might not embrace ‘ol Maggie as one of their own. Been happening to a lot of folks on FB Kim.
I’ll wager Thatcher goes first before the Queen…I’ll also wager she will be reincarnated as an aardvark.
Watching the Youtube clips over the years I have noticed that Justin always thanks his audience and appreciates them coming to see him. Well I’m going to turn the tables now.
I can only speak for myself but I would just like to show my appreciation by saying a huge THANK YOU to Justin for the brilliant music he has written as well as all the blogs, they always put a smile on my face.
I’m not going to mention anything about his good looks but a little eye candy never hurt anyone (I’m only human!).
So Justin if you are reading this thanks again for the last 26 years I’ve been admiring you and may there be many more years to come.
I know I’ve said this before but if and when you decide to tour Down Under again (some people call it the arse end of the world!) could you please bring with you some Scottish rain because we desperately need it!! Cheers. xx
Justin, there seems to be some problem with your FB page. I thought you blocked me at first! Then I spoke to Emily, who also thought she was blocked! lol That would have made me a very sad fairy indeed. I was like wtf did I do?? lol xxx
I’m blocked to :-((((
hi Glinda, i too thought he had blocked me on facebook, sad i know, i too was like “oh no.” gonna sob…..lol…but glad to know he just gone off radar it seems for a bit…..hope it wont be for too long though……x
I think he’s deleted his page, all my emails from him have disappeared too. He must be REALLY pissed off with us :-(
hi TeenageCrush@JC, sorry to read that, the same with me, i hope Justin is just having a break and may be he is just updating some stuff on face book, as i am sure he knows we all love reading his tales, and be kept up to date with his tours and stuff……i hope he knows that he has a great fans.
Have you considered that if there is a new record company coming on board they may be having a redesign of promotional sources. Equally our offers of getting involved may look a bit lame in hindsight Hoorah for our trying though.
I wondered if the record company had anything to do with it Mr C. I hope so, cause I can’t bear the thought that we may have upset him in anyway.
Before you get adjusted to your objectionable role,
I’ll be deleted, deselected…..
Listen I think there’s something really f-cked up with Facebook. A couple of my friends are having a lot of problems and another friend of mine has disappeared but she didn’t delete her account or block me. lol Looks like Facebook’s being hacked…must be those dastardly Chinese hackers….lol. I’m sure Justin didn’t just delete his account without telling us! xoxo
P.S. Let us not forget ladies and gentleman, that Mercury is retrograde…a period famous for all kinds of communications breakdowns.
They were claiming I was hacked. Who’d even bother?
LOL Apparently, you are an enemy of China Jusin! ;-) Glad to see you’re back xxxxxxxxxx
There’s a rumour it was either James Blunt or his dog.
Thank fuck for that, lot of devastated people.
So? WTF is going on? An explanation would be appreciated…and, why no tales of Sheffield?
Hmm James Blunt or his dog, thats the much bearded blind labour politician who had the affair with his Chinese guide dog isnt it?
Funny how rumours start isnt it
I’d hack into you anyday!
I’d hack you into some fillets, albiet fatty ones, with some fine Chianti Kim.
You are very cute in your glasses – is it really just an age thing to be drawn to people in glasses?
“But I love him so” she sighed to me
Late last Tuesday in the G.G.
To V, and all lost such as she,
An Ode. .
Were he foul of countenance, yet his gossamer steel wordsmithery e’er so sweet
Though he rest artfully pretty, were he vacuous or dumb, worse infragrant, inarticulate, would your heart still high beat
If his tone was curt, his tune sharp or flat, would you hold steadfast in spite of that
Adulation is free, but the sycophant merits no right of response, no rejoinder, no Echo nor acknowledgement
The bard, the busker, the satirical minstrel
Utters only what he chooses to reveal
You who search for meaning in the undertone
Be grateful he does not play you
And leave the poor fucker alone.
Well written Miss Behaviour. However, we all reveal only what we choose to reveal at all times. Justin is a human being who just happens to be a very talented artist. He’s no more likely to “play” you than I am.
And just because you are a fan does not make you a sycophant. I think you go too far there.
I was travelling this same landscape – though with less eloquence. There was a moment when I felt such compassion for the man and knew I couldn’t do what he does and face the onslaught of sightless, immoderate attention.
I was all that is mortified, ashamed and embarressed. He showed unbelievable grace and generosity in the circumstances. This isn’t even a judgement on the choices others make – it’s only what went through me. Felt the word “Sorry” and wished myself elsewhere. I’d make a crap groupie, and am not even sure I’d call myself a ‘fan’, now I feel myself recede from the whole insane circus.
By the way, this is such an interesting dichotamy that I’ll develop it elsewhere. Can’t afford to give all my ideas away for free.
Please don’t be so hard on yourself M! Great music will make you FEEL. Justin is a great songwriter. I think your blog about the show you attended was beautiful, heartfelt and genuine.
Hmm, interesting. I heard Ray La Montagne talking about how he likes to keep a wall between himself and his audience. He doesnt want to be accessible, not because he’s antisocial but because when he produces new music there is a certain mystery that he can intrigue them with.
I suppose this barrier though makes it tough for people to interact with him though when they do meet. Its remote.
They say you shouldnt meet your heroes, but Justin has been nothing but gracious whenever I have spent a couple of minutes in his company, its just that its an unequal relationship, and you desperately hope that he thinks youre not a just complete twat
What do people think of the new upbeat version of ‘Little Stars’? I love it! Not that I didn’t like the slower version.
Two thumbs up Kim!
Whatever the reason, certain comments have been deleted… does it matter that much? Get on with your lives! I love reading these tales so just enjoy them eh.
Sound advice Karen.
Hi Gareth Jones. I’ve just read your comment on the Weymouth blog and laughed till I nearly peed my pants. Don’t worry I’m still here. I did post some comments on this blog that were a little naughty and they have mysteriously disappeared-maybe Justin got a little angry with me and got rid of them, I didn’t mean to offend. Maybe I need to keep my mind out of the gutter.
Thanks Ian thought I was going mad. Maybe Justin doesn’t want our help, oh well not much we can do about it.
Is it my imagination or have a few of the recent comments been deleted?
Yes they have. I posted about us all emailing a few radio stations to get Justin played when the new album and tour are announced. Takes 5 minuites and worth doing.
Total Perfection,x
I am gutted I missed your tour this year, please tour again soon. I saw you at the Manchester Apollo in the early 90’s and it is by far the best gig I have ever been to.
You were the inspiration that made me pick up my guitar and write, to which my wife, daughter and Alf (my dog) insist they are NOT eternally greatful to you and insist I sit in the kitchen, even when I’m not playing!.
One of the first songs I ever learnt to play was ‘Be my downfall’ and it is still one of my favourite all time songs, although I tend to play some of you other stuff nowadays to amuse myself.
Anyway, promise to tour again soon and I will promise never to sing my songs in public (mainly due to the fear of an increase in the mortality rate).
Take care Mr JC
From
Almost a semi finalist
Sorry I just want to clarify something in my comment, I dont write with my guitar, I tried it but its to big for the pages, so u tend to use a pencil or pen its a much better and widely used technique, altho it doesnt make the songs any better.
Thanks
Almost a semi finalist
Great concert in Bridport or as you called it Justin , Bridgeport!! Really funny as you pissed off a local next to us!! I was the plonker when you were inviting requests who shouted “the one that says I’ll be picking through the garbage of my life” For the life of me i couid not recall the name of the song, which when I returned home came to me instantly, “The Long Journey Home” After “In the Meantime” my favourite Del Amitri song. Thanks for the gig and see you on the road soon again.
Found myself being J M Barrie after the Bridport gig – “Bad form!” For the way you scuttled out and darted back just as speedily after the gig.
When I’m flabbergasted I go all formal and Victorian…Lewis Carrol sometimes jumps out, but this time I was Barrie.
Could it be that you still can’t place the face, even in a police line-up?
Yet, we trade with you: a ticket for a performance. Anything beyond that is not obligatory, and frankly, anyone who thinks they have a right to bitch about not getting a piece of you after one encore is frankly being greedy.
“Bad form!”
And I knew I had 3 days in a row, and that I’d signed up to following the circus until Tues. I’ll skip Bromsgrove, cos I sat next to a loud Welsh man who made me want to say some very rude things to him in my mother tongue, and the gig itself was game, set and match to you – you were decent and direct and made it clear (in my perception) that there wouldn’t be any ‘meeting and greeting’ afterwards. It would be a point of honour to respect that, methinks. So I was merely myself, and drove the rental car badly.
Shit, I’m only just getting to Bath.
Bath.
Mr Currie – you are just a man, as any other. But half of you is a conduit for muses, and in that space you master the elements and weave enchantments. “I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.” when you stepped away from the mic and gave an unadorned and raw ‘Be my downfall/drowned on dry land’, I was held captive and spellbound. There are moments when you’re up there – there are moments when I’m unquestionably your girl.
Of course, the moment passes and we return to mortality, and I have nothing to say to the man that’s not cliche’d or contrived or stating the fucking obvious. And I cringe at the thought of imposing or pushing my face in his view, so I am content to let the man be.
It seems enough and I crave no more than you already give up there on the stage.
You seem capable of shyness in the flesh – (but maybe I project my own shyness onto you) and seemed a bit startled when I offered to shake your hand.
I couldn’t give you a more honest compliment than this. You are one clever bastard in your element.
Wish there was an editing option here so we could come back and correct the things we say off the top of our heads.
But then, I always wanted a tardis.
Im not going to write the usual load of old bobbins tonight after the gig.
Instead if I may confine myself to saying: thank you Justin for coming out on the road. I couldnt have loved it more.
God I love this music.
You shouted for Sticks n Stones, Girl again, didn’t you Mr Crowther!!?
Er yes I actually did to my eternal shame, I dunno I just cant seem to help myself. Its like song title tourettes.
Ps, a strange kind of venue no, maybe could have done with the PA turned up a notch or two. I could hear myself singing even though it was a barely audiable whispered caterwaul.
Did it start earlier last night I only just made it inside in time?
I have to say two songs stood out for me:
Drowned on Dry Land, was simply beautiful and two have more than one verses of it was wonderful, and Just Like a Man sounded as good as I think Ive ever heard.
Hopefully there will be another tour in September to support the album when it comes. Hopefully we will say hi then.
It would be great if Justin could get a record label to actually get him some airtime and print/media interviews and stuff for promotion this time. This music is so stunning, the world needs to hear it.
Its not: “(What about) Breakfast at Tiffanies” obviously, but its pretty good all the same. :-)
Enjoyed being very close to you tonight….. Enchanting once again Sir.
Forgot to comment on the photo. “Love in an elevator. Living it up when I’m going down”. Sorry to quote someone elses lyrics but it had to be said.
As white represents purity maybe Justin chose a white phone to match his image. Ha! Who am I kidding. Surely you wouldn’t wear a hat made out of animal, next thing you know people will be making them out of horse meat. Actually then they could serve a double purpose-keeping you head warm and if you get a bit peckish you could snack on it. If I was you I would have chosen a hat and done a runner, that would have fixed the vicious snob.
“He wards them off by chopping radishes at a lunatic intensity sounding like a woodpecker having a heart attack.” Classic! ROFL!!!
Excellent photo! And if we are all viruses in shoes as Mr. Hicks asserts, then surely you come from great germs in the best of bacterial boots! ;-)
I’m glad you didn’t buy a hat in that snobby woman’s shop. She’s the stale fart.
I hope you have a fantastic closing night!
Thank you, as always for these truly brilliant diaries!
Love, Glinda xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Have a great night, so near yet so far away! Wish I’d just got the bloody ticket and drove there. Next time! Been looking at all the recent utube uploads and love the new songs. Thanks everyone for doing that.
White’s the only way to go with the iPhone 4 (s). In this individuals’ humble opinion…
Got one myself…..but I’m a girl….
I don’t think it’s a boy/girl question. I just think the white one looks better. Then again I also think there’s no such thing as chick flicks – there’s only good or bad movies.
Any chance you could start tonight’s gig a bit earlier? We’re on our second bottle of Wetherspoon’s turps…..
Get yourself down to Chubbies for some chips an cheese. That’ll soak up the shite alcohol!
Enjoy…I’m opening a bottle of white at 7.30!!
It that a white iPhone? Isn’t that a girls phone?
Mmm-hmm..you godda problem with that?
Might have….
Justin De Niro! :-D lol